My beloved brother, I’m yet to have kids but I do have plans for my unborn, especially for my daughter, personally I know how easy it is to raise a boy. My anxiety stems from the premise of raising a daughter. It is no secret there are more ladies in our family and a lifetime of observation has made me realize the inherent nature of women. From dealing with women who are relatives, to those whom I fancy; I have noticed parallels and anomalies I will like to disclose.
Let us first consider the myth of male superiority, from the evolutionary point of view, the life of the female of any specie means more than the collective life of all males within her community. It takes a whole colony to protect the Termite Queen, Queen Bee and in the case of mammals, males kill themselves for access to the female. Nature in essence does everything to protect the female while bequeathing to the male life hurdles. For all the advantage a woman has by virtue of being a woman, she lacks one thing, as she advances in age, less men are willing to tolerate her.
This is underlying reason why a woman needs to have a ideal man as her husband before time disrobes her of her youthful charm. A woman’s beauty might get her a ring but only the sentimental value of raising a child with her will make a man tarry with her when she is gray and weak. Lana Del Rey said it best “Will you still love me when I’m no longer beautiful”. All that put into consideration what a every woman requires is not really a children but a reliable man (Husband). You as a father might be the man that loves your daughter the most, but no father will be there for their daughter when she is old and frail. It is safe to say that every father ought to teach their daughters how to attract a man not just at the evolutionary value of sexual reproduction but also accounting for long term sustainability.
Love really is not the goal of marriage it is merely a by-product, only a fool would think otherwise, it is mainly about survival. Ironically, in recent times women have been granted the choice to decide their husbands and it is no secret they are failing at it. Select few complain that “Men ain’t shit” despite only dating men they meet at night clubs, then you have the case of single mothers who who have their kids out of wedlock: some mistakes you don’t fully recover from, and the other case are of women whose marriages were incidental. The first group of women surely need someone to talk to them, someone who will not spare their feelings, insanity is dating a thug and expecting him to treat you like a queen, it takes a king to make a queen (First Lady), marrying a queen never makes you a king (First Mr.).
To the single women making kids out of wedlock, in my life time I have learned that men who have multiple wives usually favor the children of the woman they like more, men are polygamous by nature, despite societal pressure, our biology may not be undermined, it cost him nothing to keep making kids with as many women who are willing to lie with him; giving him a baby does not equal commitment on his part. For those women who assume a wedding ring /ceremony/vow, can renew a man’s motives, that to me is highly naive. Even God always check the motive of heart seeking him nowadays, he can’t afford another Lucifer.
Virtually all fathers who complain about their wives excessive behaviors, see the same trend in their daughter and choose not address, but at the same time demand the best from the men who will date their daughters. I know she is your princess, but you have to prepare her to play the role of a queen eventually. It takes a certain level of maturity, the one that requires teaching her understand deferred gratification, as life does not always follow our timetables. Most women are scared of rejection or being said “No” to, guys don’t have that problem apparently, years of serial rejection inures us to that. I remember always using my kid sister as a front to convey my request to my father, I’ve learned he rarely denies her requests. Teach your fucking daughters how to be a functioning adult, a husband won’t and should not be perceived as a daddy, otherwise appoint a sugar daddy for your daughter to help maintain her brat tendencies.
“Daddy issues” is a serious case, the absence of the sense of belonging and protection sets a dark cloud over a girl. Every daughter learns the process of a healthy relationship from the men of her immediate family, most especially from her father. Almost all women who resent men have daddy issues, the symptom of fear of abandonment. These ladies tend to express their disgust for men by becoming femme fatale. I would advise a man should never get in a romantic relationship with these type, they usually are unhealthy and sick people usually get others sick. On a side note, repeatedly aborting a fetuses is another scary thing, I had a random woman break down in my arms at a park because she missed the kid she aborted seven years ago. That right there made me realise a lady who’s had an abortion before might not be the best life partner, best she marries the man whose baby she aborted.
The only man that will most respect a girl’s femininity ought to be her father and if the father fails at this, the lady will grow to lose all respect for her femininity, to her, her body will become a means to initially get the attention she seeks from men and eventually to extort men of their resources. Becoming a stripper, porn star, and escort are options that will never be ruled out, as she winds up getting both male validation and money, killing two birds with one stone. The worst part is the exaggerated sense of entitlement . After being a sex worker the expectation is to have a good guy to come save them, often times than not they get this ideal man, but lack the sense of accountability to respect the man and ultimately forfeiting he relationship. This is quintessential toxic relationship, we all know women like this.
I am not in any way bashing sex workers, on the contrary I am all for the legalization of prostitution, my objection is having young girls victimized by the circumstances of their childhood being forced into that life as though having no other options. Women complain about patriarchy but forget that patriarchy created chivalry whilst bolstering hypergamy: a code that was set up by fathers with daughters to ensure their daughters get to be the bride of the champions ensuring she will be well looked out for. As a woman you don’t have to be the winner so long as you marry the winner, that is the beauty of womanhood. No sensible father wants his daughter ending up a whore. Nothing is wrong with whoredom except when the whore envisions a family life then whoredom poses a great threat. The saying “Do not make a Ho into a housewife” is not just an urban legend, men at the biological level innately know a whore can’t be loyal to one man and that is terrifying. As a result “working ladies” usually end up making kid with nonentities.
It goes without saying every man knows what an ideal wife is, and every father wants his daughter to be married to a well to do man later on. The problem is most fathers drop the ball on preparing their daughters on what a responsible man wants in a wife aside from his genitals. Raising a daughter is not exactly the easiest task, women may be more physically durable than men, however psychologically women are more fragile than men are. As a man who has a daughter it is your duty to make sure you are tender and firm to your daughter, be her first love and show her how to give and receive love in a healthy way, from the way you love her mother. The love you you fail to give your daughter, will be given to her by strangers at the cost of her dignity.
A daughter will seek her father’s approval, to feel treasured. The absence of a dad’s love will result in fear of abandonment thus destroying her ability ability to form healthy relationships. Often times than not, divorce/separation erodes the father/daughter bond and incidentally stripping the little girl’s support system away. A mother can’t give her daughter what her father could as far as male and female interaction goes. As a teenager I know of a girl who told me she had sex with a guy I did not like to spite me for not ever acknowledging her. At the time I was a virgin and the least of all activities on mind was sex. If she had a father or brother to talk to, perhaps they could have shed light on the nature of male and female attraction. One can only imagine by what age the same girl would categorize all men as “ain’t shit men” despite only dating men who barely respect her.
Usually step dads can’t be trusted with their step-daughters, and moms sometimes are so busy trying to spite daddy they forget to vet the creep they have to warm their beds. Divorce can be prevented, otherwise a man must try to ask his daughter questions about the step dad. If you as father can’t protect her always, at least teach her early to raise a creep alarm in the case of foul plays. Girls that get violated as kids usually do not tell anyone about it, and they hold that against men and their father who could not protect them from the predators, at times the same plays out with boys, most of my male gay friends have told me as a kid they were sexually harassed by an older gay guy..
Most women eventually want kids to include lesbians, and some women contrary to the feminist narrative want a man to provide for them,while nursing. The problem is most women who grew up without a father figure are unfit for a healthy relationship, As a result I would advice my son to avoid a lady who is from a single parent home, these women usually trade sex for attention and not for love, and mostly see men as sex objects (sperminators) or walking ATMS.
Essentially as a father you want your daughter to be the ideal woman , all you wish your wife should be. No man deserves to have his precious time wasted trying to put up with a toxic woman as proof of his love for her, like most of them toxic girls like to say “if you can’t handle me at my worst , you don’t deserve me at my best”. Teach her accountability and the benefit of patience and hardwork, setting goals instead of expectations. Nothing in life worth having comes immediately, there is always a period between sowing and harvesting.
References
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